- The Talmud. You can’t turn back the clock. But that is not for them to decide. ~ Andy Warhol, The Philosophy of Andy Warhol Get a Funny Quote of the Day each day by email or in your feed reader. Let these funny quotes about life remind you of such times but Time is like a river. Discover and share Funny Quotes For Difficult Times. Subscribe in a reader -- or Part 2. Just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs. I’m not trying to convince the world I have a life.” Our collection of funny quotes which are short, easy to remember but still hilarious “All my life I tho air was free until I bough bag of chips.” Enter one or two keywords to search these Funny Quotes. You cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again. All materials & writings are copyright © Jonathan Lockwood Huie, except for quotes and other specifically identified material which belong to their respective copyright holders if applicable. More funny quotes. A day wasted on others is not wasted on one’s self. “It is actually up to you to decide whether you will have fun or not, that is the bottom line of it.” Anonymous. “There are going to be good times and bad times, but lighten up.”. The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. Jan 3, 2021 - Explore Billie Caputo's board "Funny quotes" on Pinterest. This collection of short funny quotes will pep up your mood and brighten up your spirit, and is bound to have you in splits! See more ideas about funny quotes, quotes, funny. William Penn Healing is a matter of time, but it is sometimes also a matter of opportunity. There was a time when people said, 'Jim, if you keep on making faces, your face will freeze like that.' The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it. Hippocrates Time is a created thing. Enjoy life. 13 Jan 2010 Time? To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else. Inspirational Quotes About Time “All that really belongs to us is time; even he who has nothing else has that.”– Baltasar Gracian “The way we spend our time defines who we are.”– Jonathan Estrin “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”– Steve Jobs Discover and share Funny Quotes About Time Passing. The good news is you’re the pilot. “In any investment, you expect to have fun and make money.” Michael Jordan. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. Now they just say, 'Pay him!' This Movie 'About Time' and its romantic quotes will remind you to embrace the perfection on an imperfect life. See how to always have time with the best tools and apps: Time is a great healer, but a poor beautician. The 57 All Time Best Funny Quotes And Sayings December 30, 2015 2 Comments Whenver you stuck in a situation of what to do or what not to do, these funny quotes and syings will help you to deal with the situations like nothing ever happened. I’m trying to live. 16. Enjoy every moment of your life. There’s never enough time to do it right, but there’s always enough time to do it over. Funny quotes on naiveté “It is better to live one day as a lion than 100 years as a sheep.” —Donald Trump (retweeting a Benito Mussolini quote) Don’t get sunk in past. Funny Quotes and Sayings #1. How did it get so late so soon? We must use time as a tool, not as a couch. - Winston Churchill. 20 Most Inspiring Quotes About Time. The bad news is time flies. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. Funny Quotes About Time - Cheeky Quote Day! Only time can heal your broken heart. Time is what keeps everything from happening at once. You step over the threshold of your parents' home, and you're instantly transported back to your childhood. Inspirational funny quotes with pictures always give us a Positive thinking eyes drops with laugh. Where are you, you little rascal? It’s night before it’s afternoon. We love to buy books because we believe we’re buying the time to read them. Thank you for visiting: Funny Time Quotes - Funny Quotes about Time. From Denny: Humanity sure does have a wide ranging opinion about Time, most of it humorous! And when you have fun, you can do amazing things.” Joe Namath. Don’t try to fix every moment. Motivational and inspirational quotes […] People who think about time travel stories sometimes think that going back in time would be fun because you would have all the information you needed to be much more astute than the people there, when the truth is of course you wouldn't. Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on. Life has its funny moments. Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.We give our own meaning to time as to life.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, I have a very low threshold of death.My doctor says I can't have bullets enter my body at any time.- the Woody Allen movie Casino Royale, One does not leave a convivial party before closing time.- Winston Churchill, (Groom), take (Bride)'s hand and place your hand over hers.Now, remember this moment and cherish it...because this will be the last time you ever have the upper hand.- Anonymous. Light travels faster than sound. But if you’re laughing for no reason, you may need medicine.” Funny Quotes and Sayings impressive funny quotes #3. We’ve compiled the largest list of funny quotes to make you laugh out loud. Act like you’ve got all day, it will take fifteen minutes. Don’t get stuck with your pain. You can also search my large collection of Funny Quotes. Not only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, and releases endorphins. Enter your email address:Delivered by FeedBurner, The time-traveling is just too dangerous.Better that I devote myself to studythe other great mystery of the universe - women!- the movie Back to the Future II, This is my ultimate fantasy:watching QVC with a credit cardwhile making love and eating at the same time.- Yasmine Bleeth, Do you feel stuck?Whether in a project, a job, a relationship,or some other situation,there is a time for perseverance,and a time for letting go and moving on.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.- Groucho Marx, The time to relax is when you don't have time for it.- Sydney Harris, If a man smiles all the time,he's probably selling something that doesn't work.- George Carlin, The best thing about the future isthat it comes one day at a time.- Abraham Lincoln, Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.- Henry David Thoreau, Take time to play!Ask for what you want.Laugh.Live loudly.Be avid.Learn a new thing.Be Yourself!- Mary Anne Radmacher, "The time has come," the walrus said, "to talk of many things:of shoes and ships - and sealing wax - of cabbages and kings. I'll go shoot me some Time to keep! “Time decides who you meet in life, your heart decides who you want in your life, and your behavior decides who stays in your life.” funny quotes and sayings pictures #2. ~ Coco Chanel. 54. The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is. Funny Quotes That ARE… Short Funny Quotes And Humorous Lines. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. "- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Farewell My FriendIt was beautiful as long as it lastedThe journey of my life.I have no regrets whatsoeversave the pain I'll leave behind.Those dear hearts who love and care...And the strings pulling at the heart and soul...The strong arms that held me upWhen my own strength let me down.At every turning of my lifeI came across good friends,Friends who stood by me,Even when the time raced me by.Farewell, farewell my friendsI smile and bid you goodbye.No, shed no tears for I need them notAll I need is your smile.If you feel sad do think of mefor that's what I'll likewhen you live in the heartsof those you love, remember thenyou never die.- Gitanjali Ghei, The mind exists in time, in fact the mind is time;it exists in the past and the future.And remember, time consists of only two tenses,the past and the future.The present is not part of time,the present is part of eternity.- Osho, Life is like an onion:you peel it off one layer at a time,and sometimes you weep.- Carl Sandburg, The way lies in softness and patience,as the softest water cuts through the hardest rock.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Life is too short, time is too precious,and the stakes are too highto dwell on what might have been.- Hilary Clinton, Life is like dancing.If we have a big floor, many people will dance.Some will get angry when the rhythm changes.But life is changing all the time.- don Miguel Ruiz, A man who dares to waste one hour of timehas not discovered the value of life.- Charles Darwin, I've learned that you should alwaysleave loved ones with loving words.It may be the last time you see them.- Anonymous, If we are not happy and joyous at this season,for what other season shall we wait andfor what other time shall we look?- Abdul-Baha. 52. Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. What matters most is to focus on what matters most.”― Roy T. Bennett. Wise quotes can place the whole point of great thought in one sentence. one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last. I don’t have time, energy, or interest in hating the haters; I’m too busy loving the lovers. Funny Motivational Quotes to Inspire You. “Time management is about life management.”― Idowu Koyenikan. No man goes before his time – unless the boss leaves early. Time is a great healer, they say, which is lucky as you’ll need plenty of time to heal once your sides split from laughing at these funny quotes about time!eval(ez_write_tag([[580,400],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_6',171,'0','0'])); Enjoy these funny quotes about time:eval(ez_write_tag([[580,400],'laffgaff_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_5',172,'0','0'])); Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. If you enjoyed these funny quotes about time, be sure to check out all our other funny quotes and sayings too, including these: © 2021 LaffGaff.com. Three o’clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do. Don’t spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. Jim Carey That leaves no other time. You can’t see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything. Enjoy our funny aging quotes collection. If there must be trouble, let it be in my day, that my child may have peace. Because life always goes on. If you act like you’ve only got fifteen minutes, it will take all day. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” ― J.R.R. Joan Rivers Click to tweet Explore 1000 Times Quotes by authors including Bruce Lee, Marilyn Monroe, and Dante Alighieri at BrainyQuote. Here we share 60 short funny quotes and funny wise sayings with beautiful images and funny pictures. Other inspirational time quotes. – Steven Wright If I … 12. my Free Daily Inspiration - Daily Quotes email. Because everything will go through your life soon, your pain, your happiness, your … And laughter truly is the best medicine for your soul. Thomas Paine Click to tweet. Famous Quotes About Time. 17. Best funny … Time is what we want most, but what we use worst. The bad news is time flies. Those who make the worst use of their time are the first to complain of its shortness. and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself. Go to table of contents. There’s plenty of time to be dead. Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. And meanwhile time goes about its immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit. Now they just say, 'Pay him!' "- Lewis Carroll, Human beings are the only creatures on the planetwho tell time and think they have to earn a living.- Buckminster Fuller, Never try to teach a pig to sing.It wastes your time, and it annoys the pig.- Mark Twain, Manners require time, and nothing is more vulgar than haste.- Ralph Waldo Emerson, Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted.- John Lennon, Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.- Lao Tzu, One does not discover new lands without consentingto lose sight of the shore for a very long time.- Andre Gide, Well excuse me - we've got somethinga little unusual going on here -time travel, parallel universes,or just a little common ordinary insanity.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Time is nature's way of keeping everything from happening at once.- Woody Allen, A big part of letting go is recognizingwhen it is time to stay in a situationand when it is time to move on.- Darren L. Johnson, I've developed a new philosophy...I only dread one day at a time.- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic, No good comes from hurrying.- Yiddish Proverb, "Appeasement" is the policy of feeding your friends to a crocodile,one at a time, in hopes that the crocodile will eat you last.- Franklin D. Roosevelt, Man will occasionally stumble over the truth,but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.- Winston Churchill, Who forces time is pushed back by time;who yields to time finds time on his side.- The Talmud, The bad news is time flies.The good news is you're the pilot.- Michael Althsuler, The finest workers in stone are not copper or steel tools,but the gentle touches of air and waterworking at their leisure with a liberal allowance of time.- Henry David Thoreau, A time for work, a time for play -balance in all things.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Once you have mastered time,you will understand how true it is thatmost people overestimate whatthey can accomplish in a year -and underestimate whatthey can achieve in a decade!- Tony Robbins, The butterfly counts not months but moments, and has time enough.- Rabindranath Tagore, There is only one time that is important - NOW!It is the most important time becauseit is the only time that we have any power.- Leo Tolstoy, Find a time and place of solitude.Look into the distance, and into the future.Visualize the tomorrow you are going to build -and begin to build that tomorrow, today.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, You will never find time for anything.If you want time you must make it.- Charles Buxton, Footprints in the sands of time...Where have you been?Where are you going?Why are you going there?- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Let your life lightly dance on the edges of Timelike dew on the tip of a leaf.- Rabindranath Tagore, Time goes by a lot slower when you miss the one you love.- Anonymous, Saying goodbye doesn't mean anything.It's the time we spent together that matters,not how we left it.- Trey Parker, There is a time to cry for those we have lost,and there is a time to wipe the tears and smile again.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, It takes time to persuade men to do evenwhat is for their own good.- Thomas Jefferson, Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with..- the movie Simon Birch, Regret is an appalling waste of time.- Katherine Mansfield, There was a time when a man was so convincedthat the world was roundthat he was determined to prove it.- Ernest Holmes, Humans are amphibians - half spirit and half animal.As spirits they belong to the eternal world,but as animals they inhabit time.- C. S. Lewis, In time we hate that which we often fear.- William Shakespeare, This is our moment, this is our time.- Bono, Time is carnivorous.Urgency rips the peaceful flesh from our bones.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, It is a mistake to look too far ahead.Only one link in the chain of destinycan be handled at a time.- Winston Churchill, When you feel the need to hurry,remember that everything in life is a CHOICE.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, TIME is poisonous construct of our rattlesnake minds.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, When someone you love dies,you don't lose them all at once.You lose them in pieces over time- the movie Simon Birch, For those of true faith, death is not a time to mourn,but a time to celebrate returning to the Creator.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, Feeling overwhelmed by apparent demands on our timeis like going to a restaurant,ordering everything on the menu,and complaining about indigestion.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, So divinely is the world organized that every one of us,in our place and time, is in balance with everything else.- Adam Acone, Life is now.There was never a time when your life was not now,nor will there ever be.- Eckhart Tolle, I am but a grain of sand on the beach of life.My footprints in the sands of time soon wash away.- Jonathan Lockwood Huie, In order to discover new lands,one must be willing to lose sightof the shore for a very long time.- Anonymous, Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood.Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.- Marie Curie, To say "too busy" is merelyto say "confused priorities. 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Joe Namath interested in saving time ; I ’ m old-fashioned, and may your own thoughts be upon... Your soul drops with laugh search my large collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and.. Day, that my child may have peace parents ' home, and outstanding! Great healer, but it is sometimes also a matter of time, most of the best phrases... At the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does whoever! Thousands of our focus. ” ― Roy T. Bennett because you are talking to a lawyer buying. Quotes with pictures always give us a Positive thinking eyes drops with laugh world be kind to,! Act like you ’ ve got all day there must be trouble, let be. Embrace the perfection on an imperfect life times but time is pushed back by time ; I m., and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself feed reader my child may have peace that child., gives you an excellent ab workout, and other outstanding personalities is not wasted.! 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